The Shower

#124 - The next space of time didn't register. It could have been seconds, or hours.

Welcome to Before I Forget . .

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The Shower

It feels great.

The diverter valve was replaced in the shower and what a difference it makes.

The hot water just wasn’t hot. I thought it was the hot water tank going out.

Turns out, it was a simple fix. So glad for that but nothing a plumber does is cheap these days.

Now, the water gets really hot. I have to dial it back to keep it from scalding me.

I’ve been in here a long time. Much longer than usual, my skin is red from the heat. It feels like an itch being scratched.

I turned off the shower, closed the drain, and started filling the tub. I lay down as best I could and let the water rise over me up to my chin, a steady flow of hot water on my feet. How long’s it been since I soaked in the tub awhile, not my usual quick shower?

Around here, we are always just a couple of low-rain years away from rationing. I guess I’ve become overly water conscious.

But not this afternoon. What a luxury. Hot water. It does the trick.

Another day long past came to mind. It’s funny how memories just pop up.

It was late-morning early June, on the Merced River bridge just outside Yosemite Village. There was no wind, and the sun was already hot.

A group of guys were having fun jumping off the bridge into the river. The bridge isn’t that high. It’s only a few feet above the river. Maybe ten feet from jump-off to the water.

A cool dip would be refreshing.

I was older than those guys, but come on, if they can do it, so can I.

That was the last time I said that.

Stowing my backpack in the shade against a tree, I stripped down to my jeans and shoes.

Their eyes were on me as I moved up the bridge to the jump-off.

Calls and hoots rang out! “Go for it, Dude!”

I waved back.

I looked down. It seemed higher up from this vantage point. And the current looked faster from above. I couldn’t see the bottom like I could from the shore. ‘Too late to be thinking about it, now,’ I thought to myself.

I jumped.

The next space of time didn’t register. It could have been seconds, or hours.

Like a stainless-steel icepick through the liver. That’s what it felt like, though I’ve never really felt such a thing. It was all of my accumulated senses and thought concentrated and frozen in time somewhere in my chest. It was so cold it was hot.

How did my heart not burst? Will it, yet?

I traveled through disconnected snippets of memory. - Me and Terry scuffling, some would say fighting, over the discarded Christmas trees we used for building our forts. I must have been ten or eleven. - It was time to buy a real bed instead of sleeping on the mattress on the floor. I know she would like that. - Hey, whatever happened to that gal who was so good with clay. She was an artist. She was from somewhere in South America, right? -

Was my life flashing before my eyes?

From inside me somewhere I heard a voice - “Get out!”

My feet pushed off the bottom. I breached the water’s surface almost to my hips. For a moment, I levitated, I know I did.

Then, with no memory of getting there, I was on the riverbank, standing there full face to the sun’s warmth, swirls of color and grid-like patterns of coding, or some such, kaleidoscoping across my closed eyelids.

I swam, flew, and cartwheeled through a clear dark ether whirlpool, numb to the world.

There was laughter and voices.

“Are you okay, Dude!? Cold enough for ya’!? That’s snowmelt, Dude! Is it a rush or what!?”

Oh, it was a rush all right. Except, I’d call it shock. I felt physically changed. I don’t know how, but changed, nonetheless. Getting electrocuted changes you, also.

I got smarter, too. I swore I wouldn’t be doing such a thing again. No cold showers, cold plunges, or ice baths for me.

I know people who swear by them. Scandinavians love ‘em. I get it. I know it’s supposed to be good for you. Gets the heartrate up and all that.

Seems it might also cause a stroke. I’ll stick with hot showers, steam baths, and saunas.

I’ll have to get my heartrate up in other ways, but for now, this shower rules.

It feels great.

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